The Odds Were Not In Her Favor
by Chantal Laneau
Many women struggle with low esteem based on their appearance (weight, height, hair, shape, size). Those things did not haunt me. I was haunted by the fact that in my mind I was worthless. I literally thought I had nothing to offer the world. I thought everyone was created with purpose, but I somehow snuck on the earth and had no purpose. This was the most difficult thing for me because one of my deepest desires in life is to impact the world in amazing ways.
I was at our annual church camp one year and inside I just felt so empty. I was around my friends and the atmosphere was great, but all these years of feeling low caught up to me and something had to give. I found myself at a table away from everyone else. I had a talk with God and I told Him how I felt. I learned that confronting your fears can really set you free from them. I confronted all my feelings of inadequacy and found out where they stemmed from. I had been sexually and verbally abused while away from my mother. She left her children in the care of others and some of them did not have our best interests at heart. When I confronted those things, I found out I was bigger than those things and I thank God for healing.
My journey to knowing my self-worth started that day, but it is an ongoing journey. I call myself a Christian, but based on my views of myself I was not. I was in my bedroom one night and I told myself that if I believed the Bible then I could not think so low of myself because that’s not what the Bible says about me as a woman. It says that we are wonderfully made. I told myself to read the words and believe them. I began to speak to myself positively. I began to really look into myself and what I found is that I have a great deal to offer. I am a good writer, I cook for people and make their taste buds dance, I can get along with anyone, I care about people who I do not even know. I wonder about the individuals who hurt others because I know hurting people hurt people and I wonder how their life may have been different if they were protected by the people who hurt them.
All of the battles I faced in life were in my mind and my mind is what I have to offer because it is brilliant. Sometimes the areas where we experience the most attack is where our purpose comes from. I had to become free in my mind so I could be free in life. When I got my mind and thinking right, it was then that I found my identity.
I still fight every day in my mind, but I win those battles. I could say that I have won because I am nurse, wife, mother and blogger, however my worth is not found in those things, it is not in things period. I am happy to have accomplished those things, but I am a valuable woman just because I am me.
Looking back on my life, I know early on the odds were not in my favor, but with God I have overcome and I can proclaim that I am not inadequate and my impact on the world is just beginning.
More About Chantal
Chantal Laneau is a 27 year old wife, excited and tired new mother, RN and blogger. She currently works as a Registered Nurse, but loves to blog about her Faith, fashion and beauty.
Through her blog, Chantal hopes to motivate women all over the world to believe that they are amazing in every way, shape and form. She has overcome the odds and desire to help other women do the same.